MSNBC = Water Torture

Since my brother has abandoned his post of blog master, I have decided to try and watch the Democratic National Convention so that I can post some thoughts here, in his place.

First off, let me just say that I normally never watch MSNBC, or CNN, or any other political-news channel. All I have seen so far are overweight white guys with bad hair, in matching navy blue suits, making the same lame comments over and over again. Who the hell are these guys?

And I'm going out on a stereotypical limb here, but I'm guessing the demographics of MSNBC are mostly male. So, where are all the good looking female anchors to hook you with? Because if you are watching this channel just to hear these guys talk - then you all need to get some new hobbies. Oh wait - a female Kennedy is about to talk.... the interest level should pick up now....

Hillary's Theme Song

Since the DNC began, I thought a musical posting from Hillary to Obama would be appropriate. Oh, and Obama? Stop sending me mail, cause you ain't getting a dime. I'm saving it for Hill's 2012 campaign against McCain.

Obama loves Biden

Well, it is official. Obama is a stubborn motherfucker and has chosen Joe Biden as his running mate. While Dinosister still thinks that HILLARY CLINTON would have been the far stronger presidential candidate, the rest of democratic America was duped by Obama's smile and his hypnotic gaze.

Say what you will about Clinton, but the press slammed her and kissed Obama's ass the entire time. While I will begrudgingly vote for him in November, I will also be looking forward to watching the press rip him a new one as he stumbles and makes mistakes in public - as most humans do.

And since the press loves to prey on the mistakes of public figures, why should he be exempt?

As for Biden, I can't say anything bad against a man who, after losing his wife and young child and watching his other two children struggle to live after a horrific holiday time car accident decades ago- still takes that day off from work each year in their memory. Hopefully that is a true story about his character, and not some propaganda that the Obama Dream Machine is sending out to the masses.

Dinosaur Trader: The Early Years

In a shocking past, DT regularly watched the soap opera General Hospital, and had a fabulous Barbie collection. If I remember correctly, Ken was his favorite.

I would beg him to play Star Wars, GI Joe, or Matchbox cars with me instead, all to no avail. He would push Ken around in the pink corvette for hours on the wood floors, stopping occasionally to pick up Skipper or Barbie. He also loved the extra large Barbie head where you could style her hair and apply various shades of azure eye shadow to her lids.

In terms of his musicality back then, besides being a huge Jack Wagner fan, he really loved Rick Springfield's music and would play the album "Working Class Dog" virtually non-stop.

Happy Porn Thursday!

Dear Dinosaur Trader,
I thought for a special Porn Thursday treat, I would find a clip that combines your love of music and Brangelina.

Bill Gross' Hair

First, all respect to the man and PIMCO.

Second, I wonder if there is some kind of explanation to the lopsidedness of the hair?

If you study his face from the left-side edge, you'll notice that a huge chunk of hair always stands out. It's especially noticeable in the second picture:










































I mean, it's nowhere near Trump standard but every time I see him on CNBC I can't help but gaze in wonderment, curiosity that it is.

We Interrupt This Hijacking

For those of you around from the beginning of Dinosaur Time, you will note that DT hates to fly. It is one of the few things we share in common as siblings.

Unfortunately, I will be 36,000 feet up in the air for most of the next two days, but feel free to email me your accolades and your respect for the Lloyd Dobbler posting below.

Fear not, I will reward your silly patience with a special posting Thursday evening to celebrate what DT lamely refers to as "Porn Thursday."

The Best 80s Movie

I love Lloyd Dobbler. DT probably thinks he is a douche-bag, which is why I chose to put this clip up for his 23 viewers. If you don't feel Lloyd's pain at the end of this clip, then you are clearly a republican robot. Seriously.

Go Hillary!

Thanks to DT and his fanatic support, my girl was pushed to the side by the "non-politician" - the "I'm not going to play with those Washington bad boys" - the "a different kind of politics" Obama.

Hmmm, I'm sorry, but hasn't OBAMA turned into quite the politician lately? Flipping over and changing sides more often than a gay cowboy. (note to any gay cowboys who read this now 10th tiered blog: sorry.)


The point is, the sister thinks Hillary would have had the cahones to beat McCain. Obama? Not so much....

Feel free to send my brother "I told you the fuck so" emails when McCain beats Obama, and raises the price of organic granola to $72 a box.

now this is music

Now this is music!
True statement: DT sported this gay hairdo not too long ago.
And, I'm fairly certain he owned the same jacket that Jack is sporting here.

Hijacked!

That's right. I've had enough of this blog shit, thinking you are the best dinosaur in the family. Right now, you are camping like some crunchy granola freak in your tent with Judy, and no internet access.

From now on, this is MY site, and you are my dinosaur bitch. Traders of the world, (or the 7 of you who regularly tune in to read DTs crappy posts) I give you the real talent in the family: Dinosister.

Be prepared to cough up lots of your oily dough to send my way, and I'll reward your sorry asses with the real dirt on DT. Oh, and I'll replace his crappy music with the real deal. Be prepared for some changes around here - there is a new dinosaur in town, and she's ready to rip you all a new one for putting up with this inane blog for so long.

I will accept opening bids no lower than $5,000 to spill the DT beans.

guess which one is the dinosaur

Guess which one would be the dinosaur, if I was actually his brother and not his cooler sister?

Jane's Addiction, "Stop"

Vacation time for me. Not sure what you can expect here at the blog. Probably something, because when I walk away from this desk and interact with people, odd shit tends to happen.

The RO Report, "Living Manliness" Edition

A muddy day. No volume. Yes, you see the NYSE traded close to 1.2 billion, but it was OPEX Friday. So chop those 200 million extra shares at the open and we're the lowest volume day of the year, again... Still, the RO made lemonade out of the lemons... or, pebbles out of rocks... or Poland Spring out of tap water...

Anyway, I'm just gonna get to the numbers. I don't have too much color. I was busy doing manly shit all day... like hanging molding and ripping nails out of walls, just for the fun of it.

Out of 21 traders, 11 were positive, or 52%. I was #10 out of 21.

Here are the top 5:

1. Trader B, $4,980 on 322k shares traded.
2. Trader C, $4,095 on 158k shares traded.
3. Trader Z, $3,530 on 80k shares traded.
4. Trader F, $2,985 on 80k shares traded.
5. Trader #1, $1,519 on 18,600 shares traded.

And the bottom:

1. Trader D, -$1,888 on 79k shares traded.
2. Trader U, -$808 on 100 shares traded.
3. Trader H, -$764 on 5,800 shares traded.
4. Trader J, -$706 on 39,800 shares traded.
5. Trader T, -$420 on 2,100 shares traded.

Living Manliness

This morning, after I went surfing, I stopped to get some coffee. I was feeling charitable, so I picked one up for Judy as well.

When I got to the counter to pay, I even decided to pick up a blueberry and banana smoothie for my daughter. I was in a really good mood.

Anyway, so I had two large coffees and a smoothie. I paid, and the woman asked me if I wanted a carrying tray.

"No thanks," I said. "I got it." I felt really green, and I could see that my masculinity was almost too much for the woman to bear... I stacked the three cups and head for the door.

My car was probably 200 feet from the coffee shop. It became clear to me as I walked down the steps, that the cups were in a rather precarious position and that the bottom of the paper coffee cup was digging uncomfortably into my thumb.

But I soldiered on, carrying the cups in that position, through the pain, and even managed to smile at a couple of people as I passed. I could see, by the expressions on their faces, that they thought I was one "bad customer" carrying the cups like that.

When I got to the car, there was an indent in my thumb. I didn't even complain about it much to myself in my head. I just told myself, "shit like that happens to tough guys" and I got in my car and drove home, ready to battle the markets.

Dinosaur Trader... trader, tough guy.

Paraphrasology

-Don Delillo

He drove along turnpikes and skyways, seeing Manhattan come and go in a valium sunset, smoky and golden. The car wobbled in the sound booms of highballing trucks, drivers perched in tall cabs with food, drink, dope and pornography, and the rigs seemed to draw the little car down the pike in their sheering wind. He drove past enormous tank farms, squat white cylinders arrayed across the swampland, and he saw white dome tanks in smaller groupings and long lines of tank cars rolling down the tracks. He went past power pylons with their spindly arms akimbo. He drove into the spewing smoke of acres of burning truck tires and the planes descended and the transit cranes stood in rows at the marine terminal and he saw billboards for Hertz and Avis and Chevy Blazer, for Marlboro, Continental and Goodyear, and he realized that all the things around him, the planes taking off and landing, the streaking cars, the tires on the cars, the cigarettes that the drivers of the cars were dousing in their ashtrays--all these were on the billboards around him, systematically linked in some self-referring relationship that had a kind of neurotic tightness, an inescapability, as if the billboards were generating reality, and of course he thought of Dinosaur Trader.

The Pixies, "Ana"

Points for whoever can figure out the "secret message" of this song. And no, it has nothing to do with Marilyn Monroe...



Hint: The last line of the song...

ALSO: My blogroll is still fucked up... apologies. I will soon have plenty of time to fix this place up a bit.

The RO Report, "Porn Thursday" Edition

Okay, not sure if I'll be getting the numbers this evening. I know it was a tough day overall, with Trader Z being the only one up size, $8k. There were a couple of large drawdowns (Trader A was down $11gs by noon) and then a lot of static in between... about 50% were up and 50% were down.

I was up. At noon, I was #6 of 25 traders.

Look, summer is officially here. It's not even Friday and we BARELY edged over a billion shares on the NYSE. My advice to you... don't churn a sleepy market. It is a good way to kill your confidence and "ass mangle" your capital.

I will update this post should I get the numbers.

Go watch the Zorb video again... it's classic.

See you tomorrow.

Getting Closer...

While the shark has disappeared, the first storm is intensifying and moving due west, towards the Gulf. Expect this to become a topic of discussion on CNBC over the next couple of days if it develops into a hurricane.

Action Colleen!

This may be one of my favorite Internet videos ever... if only the Zorb could get to CNBC headquarters to take out Maria...


Hot Reporter Completely Owned by Zorb - Watch more free videos

NOTE: I'm seriously addicted to this video... it's perfect.