Weezer, "El Scorcho"

NOTE: "Win" an attack from Retardo.

Charlie Gasparino Bailed Out Dinosaur Trader

Charlie Gasparino, of CNBC, that glorious business news channel, bailed my poor ass out today at 3:25.

He said that the bond insurer ABK will be bailed out this weekend. As some dude said on CNBC earlier this morning, "somebody has to bail out somebody soon." Indeed.

Anyway, at 3:25 I was down $500 and feeling sorry for myself. My big loss on the day was in CW.



I'm calling that a "modified ass rape" as opposed to the run of the mill "ass rape" because of the little bar between the spike down and spike up. That tiny little green bar in between the big red and big green bar represents hope. Dashed hope.

I short the stock because on the daily, it had come down to $42 a number of times. With the market weak and the stock near the number, I thought a break would at least be a "safe" trade. However, I made the rookie error of not noticing how incredibly thin this stock trades.

So I broke a cardinal rule of trading post hybrid market, "thou shalt not trade thin stocks." I got some pretty bad slippage on my outs. So I lost $244.

Another nightmare for me today was DV. The stock was trading awfully today and I should have just stayed away... I lost another $240 there.

I won't even talk about my Gasparino longs. I'm embarassed I only made $700 during the rally. Everything ripped. My best, was AGO.



Anyway, I have a long weekend ahead of me. I'm going to go through each of my trades made today. EVERY DAMN ONE! Because I'm getting sick of this shit.

Meanwhile, the VO was late because after the close, we met with a life insurance dude. Talk about a guy with no sense of humor! He asked me if I used tobacco products and I told him, straight-faced, "only when I'm drunk and high." Judy spit her coffee out but the guy didn't crack a smile. Perhaps he's heard it like 1000 times before... I dunno, I thought it was funny.

This weekend, during a quiet moment, be happy.

Here's the stats:

P&L, $173
Best, AGO, $144
Worst, CW, -$244

17,400 shares traded.
16 stocks traded. 11 winners, 5 losers.

Virtual Office, $1268. SPX, +8.50, 1355.50.

Dehtrader, $481 on 7450 shares traded.
OBAT, $353 on 10,800 shares traded.
Sanglucci, $173 on 17,000 shares traded.
Me, $173 on 17,400 shares traded.
Ainkurn, $89 on 300 shares traded.
Wincity, $18 on 400 shares traded.
Retardo, no trades.
Timmay, no trades.
Denarii, -$19 on 600 shares traded.

Charlie Fucking Gasparino... the man responsible for the 250 point end of day rally in the Dow.

All I have to say is, a lot of people are going to call for that dude's head should the bond insurers not get their bailout this weekend.

Anyway, before the market freaked out there at 3:25, it was a slow grinder of a day. We made a strong move down in the morning, but on no volume, and then churned until the Gasparino rally ensued at 3:25.

We traded just over 1.4 billion shares on the NYSE and the VIX dropped a point, to 24.06.

Our new member Ainkurn made enough to go out to eat. Ducati, was AWOL on his first day... never a promising sign. Perhaps he didn't like the video. For now I'll assume we're having email issues... for whatever reason, his email travels at 1997 Internet speed.

Have a sweet fucking weekend.

Maria Bartiromo Loves Dennis Kneale

The VO will be late...

Meanwhile, Dennis Kneale just said, "Instead of the NYT being called the 'gray lady' they should call it 'the lousy old tart.'

And Maria giggled like a little schoolgirl.

Shoot me.

Ducati Rejoins VO

As many of you know, Ducati quit "the Fly's" piece of shit blog a couple of weeks ago when "the Fly" exposed Ducati's voting record in the Peanut Gallery.

Unfortunately, that left Ducati blogless and I was forced to fire him from the VO.

In the last couple of weeks, it was unclear what had become of Ducati. As it turns out, he was working to become a poet, somewhat in the vein of Willam Burroughs... below, you will find exlusive footage of him performing his poem "I Fuck Dead Pigs." (Note... NSFW)



With that, I welcome Ducati back to the VO. May his new blog be successful.

Ainkurn Joins The VO

Part of why I started the VO is to make myself feel better when I have bad days.

Like yesterday for example... I got smoked, but Dehtrader and Equine got smoked even more. So while it sucks that I got smoked, I say to myself, well, at least I'm not those guys!

Anyway, here's a new member to pad the lower depths of the VO. I mean, check out the name of their blog, 10kthrownaway. They need to speak with the "gold-toothed one" about the power of names.

Now, before you watch the exclusive footage, let me break it down for you.

The VO is underground in an undisclosed location near the center of the earth. (Incidentally, the office of the Vice President, Dick Cheney, is nearby. Sometimes I bump into him when I'm out to get lunch. He's a Dick.)

Anyway, so Ainkurn was riding the special underground train (which we've cleverly and uniquely named, the "subway") for the first time with some of the other VOers. He saw Equine and started acting tough... like he'd never seen a girl before. So Sanglucci, (the "bouncer" of the VO) stepped up and taught him a quick lesson.



Welcome Ainkurn.

News on the other new member will be released shortly...

Morning Links (the faceplant is sweet, BTW)

• An interesting post on trading and self control
• The debate was hardly "contentious" but I guess that sells newspapers.
• Tapeworm's new site... often NSFW, I found a "clean" post.
• Jon Swift weighs in on the hot new John McCain scandal.
• Option Addicts asks, "Would You Take This Trade?"
• Finally, your daily faceplant.
  

Good Morning

Time: 7:43
Mood: Hesitant