The Beatles, "Julia"

Dedicated from "Trader Z" to his late mother, for her birthday.

The RO Report, "Election Jitters" Edition

People ignored the stock market today, as they awaited the outcome of tomorrow's Presidential election. The market did shit, on shit volume, and if you traded it, chances are, you made shit.

It's funny, in the room today, early on, I said "Today feels like the kind of day where you can either make $600 or lose $3,000" and apparently, taking a look at our sad office stats, I wasn't too far off.

We just got over 1 billion shares traded on the NYSE. It was the lowest volume day since August.

Tomorrow should be more of the same. Preserve your trading capital. Take tomorrow off, go vote, hug your loved ones and be happy you're here.

The RO had a crappy day. Out of 24 traders today, 10 finished gross positive, or 42%. One trader made over $1,000 gross, while 5 traders lost over $1,000 gross. I was #4 of 24, or, bossy (kind of).

The Manservants get top billing, since they beat down the RO with their bad trades.

"Chambermaid" - Trader A, -$6,540 on 159k shares traded.

2. Trader I, -$2,016 on 23,400 shares traded.
3. Trader N, -$1,814 on 31,400 shares traded.
4. Trader B, -$1,092 on 215k shares traded.
5. Trader E, -$1,088 on 24,400 shares traded.

And here are the Bosses:

"Lucky Pierre" - Trader Z, $1,036 on 18,800 shares traded.

2. Trader C, $936 on 17,700 shares traded.
3. Trader J, $741 on 22,000 shares traded.
4. Trader S, $280 on 8,200 shares traded.
5. Trader R, $251 on 6,421 shares traded.

NOTE: Only 10 hours left to vote in the DT Presidential Poll!!!

Sarah Pailin Pranked

Issues With McCain's Site

There are always some last minute shenanigans and "irregularities" but this is different.

RO Cumulative Performance In October

Thanks to "Shortbus" we have this wonderful chart that really demonstrates the difference between the "Lucky Pierres" and the "Manservants."



Look at "Trader B" and "Trader D" practically holding hands and skipping their way to riches, while the hordes of the RO suffer their upper-middle class existences far below.

Of course, "Shortbus" produced these charts with only limited information, but still, I bet even with all the data added in, the results would be similar. Thanks again, "Shortbus."

I'm Like, So Tough.

I have a head cold. Actually, I've had it for 4 or 5 days.

But check this out... I can hardly breathe through my nose right now. Nonetheless, I am breathing through my nose.

It makes a thin whistling sound inside my head, and if I suck in really hard, a sliver of air seems to reach my brain.

Last night, while I lay in bed in the dark, receiving only trace amounts of oxygen, I imagined that I was a rubble-covered earthquake victim. In fact, I was an 8 year old named "Weisheng" and my school had just collapsed due to a 6.8 magnitude earthquake and poor local construction standards.

Anyway, I imagined that my mouth was smushed shut by a concrete cinder block and that my arms and legs were trapped, preventing me from moving. All I had, was an air-pocket created by the space under my desk and the barely existent nasal passage in my left nostril. The right nostril was completely blocked. Sometimes, (because I wasn't receiving enough oxygen) I'd get a little panicky, and think about opening my mouth to gasp for air, but then I'd remember that I couldn't, because of the cinder block.

I thought to myself, imagine this was it, and I had to remain calm and breathe like this while waiting for the authorities to dig me out. I couldn't move at all, and the only thing that separated me from life and death, was that thin little air passage through the thick mucus in my nasal passage.

The point is, I do little "exercises" like this all the time. They make me tougher. Ultimately, the cumulative effect of all these little "exercises" is victory in the stock market, because I can handle the pain, far better than you can.

Pussy.