Monday, November 3, 2008

I'm Like, So Tough.

I have a head cold. Actually, I've had it for 4 or 5 days.

But check this out... I can hardly breathe through my nose right now. Nonetheless, I am breathing through my nose.

It makes a thin whistling sound inside my head, and if I suck in really hard, a sliver of air seems to reach my brain.

Last night, while I lay in bed in the dark, receiving only trace amounts of oxygen, I imagined that I was a rubble-covered earthquake victim. In fact, I was an 8 year old named "Weisheng" and my school had just collapsed due to a 6.8 magnitude earthquake and poor local construction standards.

Anyway, I imagined that my mouth was smushed shut by a concrete cinder block and that my arms and legs were trapped, preventing me from moving. All I had, was an air-pocket created by the space under my desk and the barely existent nasal passage in my left nostril. The right nostril was completely blocked. Sometimes, (because I wasn't receiving enough oxygen) I'd get a little panicky, and think about opening my mouth to gasp for air, but then I'd remember that I couldn't, because of the cinder block.

I thought to myself, imagine this was it, and I had to remain calm and breathe like this while waiting for the authorities to dig me out. I couldn't move at all, and the only thing that separated me from life and death, was that thin little air passage through the thick mucus in my nasal passage.

The point is, I do little "exercises" like this all the time. They make me tougher. Ultimately, the cumulative effect of all these little "exercises" is victory in the stock market, because I can handle the pain, far better than you can.

Pussy.

2 comments:

Joe said...

heh, this is funny shit. this is the kind of stuff that, a while back, caused me to bookmark this site.

Dinosister said...

Are you REALLY sure we are related? You are more fucked up than I am, by a long shot, LMAO