So out of 100 of you, 56 say the page is loading slowly. That's 56% for you idiots (or, 87% of you... 19 heads just exploded). Anyway, I think removing my Twitter updates helped but still, my time at this address is growing shorter.
I've received hundreds, no thousands, of emails regarding my elite $5,000 monthly subscription based newsletter/basement apartment offer. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity and the demand has made me question whether $5,000 a month is enough. To sweeten the deal further, I promise to scoop the cat litter boxes twice daily, as opposed to the current once a day schedule (the litter boxes are located in the "basement apartment.")
I have also decided to break the subscription rates into a few levels. I will post more on this later. Just know the lowest level will be the "Compsognathus" level at $36.50 monthly. Why $36.50? Because this will put me into direct competition with the HCPG newsletter (they charge $37.50 a month).
As always, fuck the HCPG people and their "female" West Coast ways.
Finally, I just want to point out that after blogging at a searing pace to begin this year I have substantially slowed down. You bastards still get 3 posts a day but it should be clear to long time readers that I'm not even trying anymore.
That said, I feel the juices starting to flow again...
In fact, just the other day I had a real confrontation with a 7-11 employee regarding hazlenut coffee. More on this soon.